I was just learning how to fly fish when our guide Rex took Stephen and me to the Rio Grande River, just outside of Creede, Co. The trick to fly fishing is that you walk upstream, cast your fly behind the trout, and let the current take it downstream.

The stream that day was fairly fast moving with a rock bottom. If you tripped and fell, the results could be disastrous. Best case is that you get a little wet and have to fight off the chills in the late afternoon. Worst case is that water comes rushing in your waders with such a force that you become a rock and sink, OR the force of the stream takes you downstream to the Texas border.

The trick is to shuffle your feet, use a wading staff, and don’t get in a hurry.

Easy peasy.

I had not yet caught a single fish on the fly. I was two days into learning how to fly fish and was just getting to the place of being able to put the fly on the water instead of in the trees. Stephen and Rex waded ahead of me into the canyon wall section of the stream. I was fishing the washouts and faster moving water as it came out of the canyon.

After a couple of hours, the water exploded. I grabbed the line, lifted the rod and felt the sweet satisfaction of “The Tug.” The rush was incredible. Now came the hard part – landing the fish and taking a pic to prove I’d finally caught a trout on a fly.

I’d seen Rex and Stephen do this trick of keeping the line tight while walking downstream so that you don’t disturb your fishing hole. This allows you to land the fish and then walk back upstream to pull more fish out of where you caught the last one. It’s a fairly straightforward process. How hard can it be?

I never made it to the second step.

I didn’t shuffle my feet. My wading staff was on the bank. I was excited about catching my first fish, so I was hurrying.

I never realized how fast waders could fill up with a cold mountain stream.

In the span of 10 seconds, my chest waders were full, and I was headed toward downtown Creede, Colorado. I dug my heels into the bottom of the stream and found a rock above water to hold on to. I worked my way around to the backside of the rock where the current wasn’t as strong to catch my breath.

I managed to drag myself to the shore and crawled on to dry land. I knew immediately what I needed to do, but for a split second, I debated doing it.

It’s just embarrassing. Maybe I could make it back to the car before hypothermia set in. That way nobody else would know what happened.

Pride can really influence you to make some stupid decisions, can’t it.

Instead, I did the right and smart… and embarrassing thing. I took off all my clothes down to my underwear and found a big rock in the sun so that it could warm both me and my clothes up.

For the next couple of hours, I sat there in my underwear doing exercises to keep warm. I got a chance to wave to a fellow friendly fly fisherman as he was heading upstream to where Rex and Stephen were fishing.

Embarrassing.

But alive.

What’s the point of this?

We are going to learn in this series in front of us that the abundant life that Jesus promises us is only found in Kingdom Living. And we will only be able to experience Kingdom Living if can get over ourselves.

Embrace the failure. Do what you know you need to do, not what your pride is telling you. Take it to Jesus, and wait on Him. Don’t try to cover it up with lies or good works or explanations or excuses.

Just embrace the situation for what it is. You messed up. Now find a Rock and get in the Son. Let Him go to work on the situation.

I know it feels counter-intuitive to our way of life. I know we feel this huge amount of pressure to ‘fix it’ ourselves. I know the temptation to think, “Maybe I can make it to this point, and no one will know.” But all of that is just our pride trying to talk us into another bad decision that will not lead to life.

As we learn more about the Kingdom and how to live in it, know that it starts with understanding that we can do nothing to earn it on our own.

Follow the whole series here.
Watch the whole message here.

Over numerous conversations with Pat Abellon, he would tell me how he doesn’t enjoy speaking in front of people, how he gets extremely nervous, that English is not his native language. He doesn’t like the attention. What if he freezes up and can’t remember anything? What if people hate his painting? Even before the service on Sunday during our warm up interview, he was visibly nervous.

But then Sunday happens… Yeah… About all those concerns…

Pat’s passion filled the room and drew us in. His heart was on full display, and it was incredible to watch the audience get completely drawn in. When we revealed the painting, you could here the audience gasp. The room just locked onto him, and he did a fantastic job of not just presenting his painting, but revealing his heart.

Isaiah 1:18
“Come now, let us settle the matters,” says the Lord. “Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool.”

4 Big Thoughts On Crucified

Affirms the testimony of the Old Testament
From Genesis 3, we’re told without the shedding of blood there is no remission of sin. God has to kill something innocent to cover Adam and Eve. That’s the true nature of sin – more on that in a moment – and the entire sacrificial system was a reminder of this. The cross ultimately fulfills this.

Shows true nature of humanity
What happened on Easter was just a microcosm of humanity’s entire history with God. God is brought to trial for being…God. For being good and just and holy. And humanity has the arrogance to act as judge, witness, jury, and executioner in the trial.

In the garden, humanity deemed that God was lying, that God was holding out on them. Humanity took the fruit of knowledge and rejected the life God offered. The brothers of Joseph rejected God’s plan. The people rejected God’s provision of the Exodus. They rejected God’s provision in the dessert. They rejected the Promised Land – didn’t want to take it when and how God said. The whole time of the judges is exactly this. They reject God’s reign for a king. They refuse to listen to the prophets. And now in the Crucifixion – they refuse to listen to the very Son.

It still continues today. There is no Jesus; he’s not God; there is no god. What follows is a life full of despair, hurt, corruption, evil and death. And then, out of our ignorance and arrogance, we hold God accountable.

The cross is the worst that humanity can throw at God.

Shows true nature of sin
Sin doesn’t just lead to death, it is death. All sin, not just some sins. Why? Because sin is the rejection of a relationship with the Giver of Life.

We underestimate sin. It’s not something to be managed or controlled. It’s not some bad habit that really isn’t that bad. It’s not a flaw. It is something that will kill us. It’s something that NEEDS to die. On the cross, God deals with it the only way it can be dealt with — He kills it.

Shows true capacity of God’s grace
The cross is the worst of humanity. The cross is the worst of sin. The cross is the best of God. He takes all of that, absorbs it, defeats it, redeems it with His unconditional love and grace.

Looking Forward… Cullen Swearingen
The first time I met Brad LeDuc and Michael Mize, they said to me, “Cullen needs to be one of our 5 artists.”

“Cullen? Our Cullen? The Bearded Youth Pastor Cullen? Why would we ask Cullen?”

Then Brad busted out Cullen’s portfolio from his AP Art days in high school. Cullen won some awards for his art when he was in high school, and Brad had kept it all these years.

Yesterday I got to stare at the piece that Cullen painted for our series. Speechless. It is absolutely stunning. We are going to be blown away by this painting on Sunday.

There is also something very beautiful about having a student of Michael Mize and Brad LeDuc in this mix. It perfectly models discipleship. But we’ll unpack all of that on Sunday.

Art is important, because it says what we can’t put into words. It helps the soul sing. It speaks to the emotions. It moves us when we least expect it. So glad that we are on this journey together.

Listen to Cullen unpack his painting here.

I’ve known Cullen since his junior year in high school. Been to Brazil with him. Married him and Jessa. Hired him as an intern and a student pastor. We have stayed up late waxing eloquently on the redemptive themes of the Star Wars movies sans the prequels.

So I had a vested interest in the piece he was submitting to this series. And knowing Cullen, I knew there was going to be some deep symbolism, an assumption in which he did not disappoint.

I will not recount the whole explanation here. I’ll just hit the two big highlights for me.

The first highlight was the tree on the right hand corner. The light from the empty tomb hits the tree and it comes to life. The side with no light – no life. It’s a beautiful reminder of how trees are integral to the story of God.

In the beginning we have two trees…
On Golgatha we have a tree…
Between them we have family trees reminding us of God’s promise…
We will have a tree in the final chapter…

The refrain and inclusion of trees in these paintings were not planned. It’s happened very organically in a way that screams of the hand of the Spirit.

The 2nd big highlight for me and it’s not as noticeable on the digital copy as it is on the canvas are how all the fractures are held together by a red seam. In some of these places, it looks like a red cross. And for good reason – it’s the blood of Christ that redeems and binds all things together. Christ will work in the darkest of places redemptively.

Mentors and Wings
As I was watching Cullen on Sunday, it wasn’t lost on me that sitting in the audience were two of his mentors from the art world: Michael Mize and Brad LeDuc. And that he was speaking in the church where he renewed his relationship with Jesus as a high schooler. And where he now serves on staff.

That’s a pretty good picture of the results of discipleship.

Up Next
This Sunday is Brad LeDuc. It’s hard to imagine this series without his help and leadership. He reached out to these other artists and made introductions. He was the one who captured what this series could have been and helped pushed us to explore what it could look like. He’s also the one I’m very thankful for because I feel like I’ve gained 4 new friends through this process.

I can’t wait for you all to see his work on Sunday.

Concerning Himself, by Michael Mize

I feel like we just got to ride on a missile.

Mind. Blown.

Pretty much everything I thought I knew about Jesus is really nothing in comparison.

I am more in love with Jesus after that encounter than I’ve ever been.

Just a few of the comments I received after this past week’s service with Michael Mize. Before I get into some of it here, let me throw a couple of helpful links your way:

Follow the whole series here.
Listen to the whole service here.
Find more of Michael’s artwork here.

Incarnate
From the beginning, it had to be Michael to depict Incarnate. He is a deep thinker. He is well read. He is a passionate follower of Jesus. He also radically changed his life a few years ago to be more intentional with the festivals and feasts of the Old Testament. This comes out in waves in his painting and his explanation of it. As a family they observe these key events on the Jewish calendar. They worship on the Sabbath. When Michael speaks of these events, he does so from a place of immersion. It’s not just book knowledge for him. It is something that he has chosen to live out and experience as best as he knows how.

In some instances, this lifestyle choice can come across as legalistic or even judgmental. It’s possible to be so consumed by the rituals that one forgets what in the world they were established for in the first place. But you get none of that with Michael. There is a furious inquisitiveness that seeps out of Michael. This is cushioned by a gentleness of soul that invites you in on his journey. I felt like that is exactly what happened to us on Sunday morning. That furious inquisitiveness took us on a journey with his gentle soul.

The context for the work is Jesus walking with two disciples from Jerusalem to Emmaus after the events of the crucifixion and resurrection in Luke. We are told that these two disciples were still processing the events of Passover, trying to figure out how it all fit into their expectations of Jesus.

And Jesus (unknown to them at the time) spends a half day with these guys explaining to them how it all fits from the Scriptures. Of course, the Scriptures back then would have only been what we commonly refer to now as the Old Testament. Basically, Jesus takes their entire life experience as a Jew and shows them how it all pointed to Jesus.

Michael conceptualizes this through symbolically representing the 7 key events of the Jewish calendar. He works these in, working from the left foreground, back and around to the right foreground. Michael expertly navigates these in our interview with not just a deep understanding of what these days are, but how Jesus ‘incarnates’ them for the Jews. This is by no means an exhaustive list of what we talked about, but these were the highlights for me.

Passover – The blood on the doorposts is written in shape of the letter that represents the word ‘life’ in Hebrew. So as people are painting on the doorposts, they are actually painting the word ‘life’ on their house.

Unleavened Bread – Unleavened bread was grilled and broken and hidden and found. Just like Jesus – he was whipped, broken, buried, and found (resurrected).

First Fruits – Jesus was the first fruit of the resurrection, with the nod to the strips of linen.

Pentecost – When the law was first given, there was thunder, lightning, and down in the camp 3,000 people lost their lives while worshiping a golden calf. On the day of Pentecost in Acts, there was thunder and a great wind upon the people as 3,000 put their faith in Jesus.

Tabernacles – The concept that God has chosen to make His dwelling among us is central to the story of God. From the days of the exodus and the instruction to build the Tabernacle in the middle of the tribes, to Christ who made His dwelling in the middle of his people.

Day of Atonement – The two different but necessary goats. One goat to take away the sin of the people. The other goat to cover the sin by being sacrificed. Jesus does the work of both goats.

There are so many more details and nuances in the painting, but you NEED to listen to the whole interview to catch them all. At the bare minimum, what I hope people walk away with are 4 BIG THOUGHTS.

Big Thought 1: Jesus fulfills EVERYTHING foreshadowed in the Old Testament.
Every prophecy. Every festival. Every ritual. God put glimpses of Jesus inside all of it. He left so many clues – some obvious, some not-so-obvious – because He did not want His people to miss Jesus.

Big Thought 2: Jesus becomes the 2nd Adam, the physical sacrifice.
All throughout the story of God we are told that there is no forgiveness of sin without the shedding of blood, AND that God will provide the sacrifice. This brings us all the way back to Genesis 3 when sin first enters the story. Sin has always cost an innocent life. And God has always had to provide that payment. The sacrificial system was set up to remind us of this. The Incarnation is God’s solution to handling this once and for all.

Big Thought 3: Puts physical nature of humanity in proper perspective.
So often we have this incorrect understanding of sin. “If it tastes good, feels good, or is physically pleasurable in any way – it’s probably sin. Only the spiritual is good.” Wrong. God created these senses. It was part of his design and heart for us to experience them. It’s been warped and abused and misused. It’s been weaponized and applied in the wrong contexts. By Jesus putting on flesh, it reminds us that we are wonderfully and creatively made. Physical. Emotional. Intellectual. Spiritual. And maybe the lines between these are not as clear as we would first think.

Big Thought 4: Jesus unequivocally answers the question, “What is God like?”
This is the most important Big Thought. God did not leave who He is or what He is like up to interpretation. He put flesh and blood on His answer. He put date and time on His answer. He lived out His character for all to see.

Lingering Thoughts…
For those who are investigating Jesus, I hope you are moved beyond the caricature of Jesus that you think you know. The good teacher, moral leader, nice guy that can be brushed off as someone whose followers have stepped off the deep end.

I hope particularly after this first word you begin to understand that Jesus was and is and will always be THE plan by God to redeem humanity. That Jesus didn’t just happen or was Plan B. I hope you can at least begin to recognize the detail and thought and planning that God went through to make the Incarnation a reality for us.

I also hope we Christ-followers see the ramifications of the Incarnation. Christ now ‘incarnates’ His church to live out the Gospel to all the world. The church is designed to incarnate God to a lost world. We don’t stand to judge the world – not our job. We aren’t here to be the morality police. We are here to live out Jesus. There will be some who resist and reject. There will be some who don’t understand.

But there are hundreds of people who don’t understand Jesus simply because they’ve never seen Him lived out in front of them. So, just as the Father sent the Son…the Son with the power of the Holy Spirit sends us.

Let’s go be the Church.

Last July I felt challenged by God with the question, “Is Western Hills becoming the church God really wants her to be?” Through the following months of challenging the staff and elders with the same question, deep introspection, and seeking wisdom from trusted mentors, a path emerged. That journey is what we’ve tried to communicate with the series We Are The Church.

Western Hills exists to live out the reality of Jesus for those far from the Gospel.

Out of this series came that statement, and it’s a great statement… BUT how will we flesh that out? What about each one of us having an intentional conversation about the Gospel with someone we already know who is far from Jesus? If 300 of us purposed to have one conversation a month with a friend who was far from the gospel about our relationship with Jesus for one year, that’s 12 conversations this year for a total of 3,600.

3,600 conversations.
3,600 people who are loved by someone who loves Jesus.
3,600 people getting a clear picture of Jesus.
3,600 opportunities to walk from death to life.

And that’s the challenge for us in 2018 – to have 3,600 conversations with those far from the Gospel. We still have some learning to do, and our next series, Just Walk Across The Room, is aimed at how to have these conversations from a genuine place, not selling Jesus like a door to door salesman.

We’ve set up a place to gather these stories. We’d love to hear about them and join you in prayer. Here are the options:

* write in the space provided,
* upload a 1-2 minute video about the conversation, or
* email us directly.

Please let us know whether or not we can share this story or if it needs to remain private. Throughout the year, we want to hear some of these stories to celebrate what God is doing. (We’ll never publish or tell a story without your permission.)

I’m so excited to see how God is going to work through these 3,600 conversations. He’s going to blow us away with this journey.

Presents are wrapped.

Decorations are in full bloom.

School is all but done for the year.

College Bowl picks are in.

Food plans are done. (Full brunch for Christmas Eve. Cajun Fried Turkey for Christmas Day.)

Now…we wait.

At least that is what I thought as a kid. Wait through visiting relatives, wait through church services, wait through meals so that we can finally get to the point of the whole season —— PRESENTS!!!

It’s true – I hate waiting. I hate waiting in lines, on the phone, for my food. I hate that I have to wait for the next Star Wars movie (yes, I did like The Last Jedi. I hated waiting for it.) I don’t like waiting on traffic lights.

But I have to admit that God does some of His best work while we are waiting. And Christmas was His best work as the world had waited thousands of years for that night.

As you wait this year…I’d like to invite you to two meaningful opportunities.

Carols on Friday, December 23rd. We will meet up at the church at 6pm and travel to a local nursing home to sing carols for their residents.

Christmas Eve Service at 4:30 and 6pm. We’ve got a special night of carols, communion, and candles as we celebrate the wait for our Savior.

Whatever you plans may be, I pray that your wait is as fulfilling as the day itself.

Merry Christmas, Western Hills.

During our morning services on December 17th, we will be asking for congregation affirmation on the 2018 Budget.
Our budget process starts back in late August with the staff and ministry team leaders being asked to think through the upcoming year. It’s during this process that we evaluate what we do through the lens of Love God, Live Connected, Serve All, and Multiply Another. We want every single thing we do and touch have something directly to do with one (or more) of these values.
Once the ministry teams submit their budgets, it goes to the Finance Team and staff. We spend a lot of time here making sure that what we have planned for 2018 fits our mission and vision. During the month of October, there is a lot of back and forth between staff, ministry leaders, and finance team. In November, the budget is presented to the Church Council for final review. Once that review is given, we (Church Council, Finance Team, staff, and ministry leaders) take a couple more weeks to pray over the budget before sending it to the congregation for final affirmation.
Couple of highlights for this year’s budget. Your giving went up this year. In fact, this is the 3rd year in a row giving to Western Hills has increased. For 2018, we have increased our missions giving across the board. This is going to allow us to sponsor more individual trips as the team sees fit.
There are not a lot of changes for 2018. You may notice that administrative costs went up. With more traffic in the building due to our Upward and children’s ministries, we have high utilities and maintenance on the building. In fact, we increased the reserve fund this coming year for the potential that some of our AC units may need replacing. We understand that technically we could classify some of our administrative costs under Love, Live, Serve, and Multiply. For simplicity sake, we’ve chosen to show it as administrative.
One final note about the Capital Expenditures. These are projects like replacing carpet or patching the parking lot that we would do ONLY if the rest of the budget was met first.
Over the next few weeks, you will hear our heart for what we think God is calling us to in 2018 that this budget supports. More details are coming during our Sunday services.
If you would like more information about the budget or our finances, please drop us an email at office@whillschurch.org or finance@whillschurch.org. You can also download these two information graphics with the link below.
2018 Budget Graphic

As we make the turn towards 2018, I wanted to take a moment on this “Giving Tuesday” to say “Thank You.” Thank you for being a generous church. I’m not sure when “Giving Tuesday” became a thing, but I am so thankful that I am part of a church that gets generosity. And Western Hills, you get it.

We gave away more money this year to missions work than in any time since I’ve been here (9 years). We sponsored more folks on missions trips. We sent 13 people to Honduras to minister with Trash Mountain Project. We increased our giving to Christian Challenge and IMB missionaries serving in closed countries. We sponsored more kids in our Upward Programs. We supplied backpacks and school supplies for all of McCarter Elementary. We bought Blotch books for a special needs ministry. We had a massive response to both Sharefest and BackSnacks.

That’s not even the whole list either. So let me say it again – Thank YOU!

As you wrap up your year-end giving, I hope Western Hills is on your list. When you financially support the ministries at Western Hills, it has both a local and global impact. I am both proud and humbled to be a part of a church that is so focused on ministering to those outside of our own walls.

A couple of reminders as we wrap-up 2017:

1. The cut-off date for tax-deductible gifts for 2017 is December 30, 2017. If you mail in your check, be sure to make sure it is dated on or before that date.

2. Online givers: REMEMBER TO RENEW YOUR PASSWORD! Our online giving system requires every user to renew their password at least once a year and to sign back up for online giving. The reason is simple. We care about the security of online giving, AND we never want to take your giving for granted.

Give Online

An Invitation To Start 2018
Over the next couple of weeks, you are going to hear about what God has put on my heart for 2018 during our services. A few months ago, I was challenged with a quote from Dallas Willard. I’m paraphrasing here, but this was the essence of it:

There are scores of people who die and go to hell every day because the reality of Jesus was never lived out in front of them.

This started a whole line of questions for me. What does living out the reality of Jesus look like for an individual? For an entire church? What does a church look like that takes seriously living out the reality of Jesus for those far from the Gospel?

We are going to explore these question and more in the first teaching series of the year, We Are The Church. I urge you to attend this first series of the year AND get involved in one of our Connect Groups that will be covering the same material. More details are coming.

Let me say this one more time – THANK YOU, WESTERN HILLS! Thank you for being a part of impacting Topeka and beyond by your giving to the ministries of Western Hills Church.

Each of you should give what you have decided in your heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.
2 Corinthians 9:7

butterfly on leaf

I was invited to speak this week about parenting at NetReach’s weekly meeting in the Hi-Crest neighborhood. Taco Tuesday is what it is lovingly referred as.

For those that don’t know, over 60 years ago Hi-Crest was a thriving neighborhood of military families that served at Forbes Field. Today? It’s drastically different. Most Hi-Crest families find themselves in a cycle of poverty, living in a neighborhood of declining property values and high crime rates. Topeka Rescue Mission began focusing on this neighborhood in 2013 with the NETReach Initiative.

Of the many opportunities and programs that NETReach offers, Taco Tuesdays are kinda special. They have a community meal, a large group speaker who introduces a topic for the evening, then they break up into small groups to flesh out that topic in their life. My task was simply to put everything I know about parenting into a 30 minute window.

Easy Peazy, right?

I was nervous. By all standards imaginable I have it easy compared to every single person in that room. Gun shots don’t awaken me at night. I don’t have a drug dealer living next door. I don’t fear for my kids life when they play outside. I’m not worrying about where the next meal is coming from. We live less than 15 miles apart. It might as well be another universe.

Was it arrogance on my part to even agree to speak here? After 26 years of marriage and 3 kids of my own – I’ve learned my fair share about parenting but how much of it is really applicable in this setting? And would they even want to listen to me?

So I gave my talk and nobody left or got angry or got up in the middle of it. In fact, some common themes became self-evident.

We love our kids. We want the best for them. Parenting is both the most rewarding and most frustrating undertaking in our lives. We know all too well our imperfections and faults as parents. We want to grow and improve as parents.

Regardless of the environment you grow up in, it’s part of a parent’s instinct to rescue our kids when we see them struggle. Whether that be when they are learning to tie their shoes, their chemistry homework, or relationship issues among their friends and/or significant others. Every parent has felt the tug to rush in and fix it. To stop it. To make it better. To make it right.

It appears to be a noble effort. In fact, there would be many that would say that is the essence of parenting – helping the child. That instinct to rush in and relieve the pain, remove the frustration of the struggle. We have this incredible capacity to avoid pain and struggle at all cost – for ourselves and for our children.

But we also want strong kids who grow into strong adults. Adults who can navigate the choppy waters of life, who don’t shirk from a challenge.

There’s a tale of a science teacher who brought a cocoon into his class. As the kids watched the cocoon start to move, they realized there was a caterpillar-now-butterfly fighting to get out. Overcome with compassion, one kid rushed to open the cocoon to help the butterfly get free but the teacher immediately stopped her.

“If the butterfly doesn’t struggle to get out, it will not develop the strength to fly.”

One of our family’s favorite sayings is “Hard isn’t bad, it’s just hard. And we can do hard things.”

So perhaps the role of a parent is to walk WITH our kids through their struggles. Giving them tools THEY need and can use, coaching them how to keep their head about them.

I think this is exactly how our Heavenly Father parents us. How many times have I argued with God for comfort, for ease. For the nice, comfortable way out of a situation or conversation…

I’m learning that it’s still okay to pray that way – “Father, remove this cup from me…” as long as I allow him to make that final call…”but not my will, yours.”

He’s earned that trust from me – even if at times I can’t admit it or see it. He’s proven over and over again that He is with me in my struggle. And that’s enough for me…for now.

I have the Bible app, and it dings me every morning with the verse of the day. Typically I read it, pray over it for about 5 minutes, then go on to Oswald Chambers (or whoever I am reading at the moment). But today’s verse ambushed me.

I have asked one thing from the Lord; it is what I desire: to dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, gazing on the beauty of the Lord and seeking him in his temple. Psalms 27:4. CSB

‭Think about that first statement. “I’ve asked one thing from the Lord…”

Not hardly. I’ve asked for safety, strength, health, favor, comfort, wisdom, insight, courage, faith, words to say, and discipline to keep quiet. I prayed for me, my wife, my kids, my friends, my church, co-workers. Heck, I’ve even prayed for my ENEMIES lots of those things.

And don’t get me started on what I really desire.

It’s not that I don’t want Jesus. It’s that I don’t ONLY want Jesus.

Yes, I want Jesus, but I also want…other stuff. And I’m not talking about the list of ‘new’ things. I don’t want a new car, a new house, a new job or whatever else new you’d like to put on that list.

But ask me if I want Jesus more than I want my family to be healthy? Safe? Happy? Ask me if I want Jesus more than I want to see my kids struggle through something in their own life? Ask me if I want Jesus more than I want financial security or job security or relationship security?

Do I have to answer? The fact is my soul already has answered, and He knows it. He knows I’m compromised, that my belief fluctuates from being as strong as steel to as feeble as cardboard. He knows what I wrestle with daily, and the Psalmist is in the same boat. The rest of the psalm is a plea to God to save his life from his surrounding enemies. So it’s not as altruistic as it first sounded.

I have snapshots and living, breathing examples in my life where all of Jesus is all that I needed. I have story after story of His presence providing more than enough of the calm, the strength, the courage, the insight, the wisdom that I needed. I can point to you time after time where Jesus has conclusively and without doubt proven to me – over and over again – that He is all I need and will EVER need.

How much time do you have? I can fill it with personal stories – not other people’s stories but my own – of how when I am focused and walking with Him, it’s the best thing ever in EVERY ASPECT OF MY LIFE.

So two profound truths hit at this point.

Profound Truth #1: This is what Heaven is really like. It’s about Jesus, all and only about Jesus. It’s not about playing golf with our departed loved ones, or fishing forever with the disciples. It’s not about streets of gold, eating what ever we want without having to count calories, or whatever ridiculous stream of pleasures you think Heaven is going to provide.

Heaven is about eternity with JESUS in a way that is impossible to be with Jesus today. Today gives us the taste, the glimpse of what that reality is going to be like. It’s an awesome, wonderful taste. But if you don’t want that taste today, you’re not going to want anything that Heaven offers. If that glimpse doesn’t fire you up now, then Heaven has nothing for you. Because Jesus is ALL that Heaven offers. Jesus IS Heaven.

Profound Truth #2: Why is it that today I still struggle to find time for Him? Why is it that today the numbers in the bank are louder than His voice? Why is it that today I will worry about my daughters more than I will pray for them? Why is it that today I desire to be seen as productive rather than connected to Him? Why is it that today my circumstances are winning instead of Him?

I have no answer for the questions. Perhaps that is part of the issue. He uses our struggle in ways we do and do not understand. We know the struggle is real, and we know it makes us stronger. But there are times that I don’t want to be stronger. I just want Him.

I think Psalm 27 was written on a day like that. And I wonder if God wants us to have more of those kinds of days.