My grandmother loved her Oldsmobile Delta ‘88: V8 engine, light blue, and roughly the size of an Abrams M1 tank. That car had a special place in her heart. I also remember the day my grandfather traded her beloved Oldsmobile Delta 88 for a 4-cylinder Chevy Citation about the size of her sewing machine.

He had made the deal without her knowledge. As he pulled up in the driveway, the first question my grandmother asked was, “Where is my car?” When my grandfather answered, “This is your car,” some untouched region of fury was unleashed from my grandmother. My grandfather may have served in the US Navy during World War II, but it is doubtful he ever suffered such a barrage of language in his life.

We grandkids didn’t even get to hear all of it. We were quickly whisked inside, while the rest of the neighborhood got to enjoy the sights and sounds of an unhinged grandmother in a complete DEFCON 1 meltdown.

There was no filter with my grandmother. She said what she thought with no holds barred. I loved her dearly for that, but… don’t you think there is something fundamentally wrong with having to have the last word in every single argument?

Then Daniel responded with tact and discretion to Arioch, the captain of the king’s guard, who had gone out to execute the wise men of Babylon.
Daniel 2:14

For the Christ-follower, there is something much more important at stake than just winning an argument. The people that we often find opposite of us on important issues are NOT the enemy. They are prisoners of war. They are stuck in a prison they can’t see, taste, or touch, but it is a prison nonetheless.

It’s our job to live out our faith and introduce them to Jesus. Will it mean at times fighting for right and truth? Yes. Redemptively. Not win at all costs. Not in a way that insults or disrespects… Speaking with discernment is not an option for Christ-followers.

To use the phrase ‘That’s just how I am’ or ‘That’s just what I think’ ignores the command of Jesus to be transformed by the renewing of our mind. It ignores what his Spirit is trying to do in our life to make us look more like Jesus. It completely misses how Jesus spoke and lived when he was on the earth. In short, to say what we want, when we want, is blatantly disobedient to Jesus.

Daniel responded with tact and discretion. That should be the norm for Christ-followers. That doesn’t mean we compromise the Gospel of Jesus. We are still all sinners, completely a mess without Jesus, and He is humanity’s only hope. But HOW we speak of the story of God is JUST AS IMPORTANT as the story itself.

Let me say that again. HOW we speak of Jesus matters just as much as WHAT we speak of Jesus.

Why else do you think God sent Jesus to earth? He was done relying on humanity’s own version which was being communicated about Himself.

Let’s take a careful look at our conversations and interactions with the people around us. Is it discerning? Is it full of tact and discretion? Or does our mouth need an emergency brake to stop the flow of words at times? If we are going to thrive in Babylon, we’ll need to learn discernment.

And not talk like my grandmother.